Don't be rash: some reminders from a friend who has been there in case you are struggling today

On Instagram, I follow a lot of people who are in the throes of withdrawal and over time I have noticed the same worries and fears come up that hang over our condition like a pall until we are not only fighting the truly awful physical symptoms of withdrawal, but also battling the demons inside our head that are constantly telling us we are doing the wrong thing. With that being said, I thought I would put together a few reminders for anyone who is struggling right now in the hope that it acts as a little tonic to help keep the monsters in your head at bay.

I suppose in a way I am writing this to the me of a few years ago in the midst of withdrawal – the girl who was scared at times that maybe she did just have eczema and all the doctors and dermatologists were right; the only answer was to use stronger topical steroids and immunosuppressants for life to have any semblance of normality. I know this path can feel like the wrong one but in reality, it is the best thing you will ever do for you and your skin, and I believe that overcoming the symptoms in your mind is the real challenge of TSW ... not convinced? Well just take a moment to think about what would happen if you took away all those doubts and fears ...

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There is no such thing as backwards, only forwards, and even though it may not feel like it, every day that passes brings you one day closer to recovery.

You WILL get better and are not the anomaly who just has eczema. If you are on this journey, you are on it because you have TSA. The decision to go through something like TSW is not normally made because of some arbitrary whim you had – if you are on this journey, you are on it for a pretty concrete reason.

Remember why you started TSW – the desperation you felt followed by the relief when you realised you had found the answer you had been waiting for. In the moments where you feel like giving up and just want to go back to using topical steroids, think about what compelled you to stop using them in the first place – why did you stop?

Anxiety, doubt and fear are the worst symptoms of TSW.

Recovery is not linear. There will be ups and downs and most will not gradually get better. There might be a long period of calm followed by a flare that takes your breath away, or you might be in what feels like a perpetual flare, but whatever you do, don't be discouraged because at any given time you are always one day closer to getting better.

Elephant skin goes. Just like the oedema, weeping skin and bone-deep itching, elephant skin is a symptom of TSW and only temporary. 

Feeling guilty for scratching is like feeling guilty for breathing. Scratching is inevitable.

This process takes time, and lots of it. Time is the only true ‘healer’ of TSW.

Give yourself a pat on the back – you're doing the best you can.

Never feel guilty. Period.

Do not compare your withdrawal to another person's as it will only lead to disappointment and anxiety. How long it takes to recover differs from person to person.  

Eat the damn cake if you want to.

You are not alone.

I thought I would finish by posting this picture I put up on my Instagram account recently. The photo on the left is from Friday 9th August 2013, just over 2 months into withdrawal. The middle photo is from Wednesday 18th February 2015, over 20 months into withdrawal. The photo on the right is from Sunday 13th March 2016, 33 months into withdrawal. Having a wrist like the middle photo after twenty months of withdrawal was disheartening to say the least - I couldn't even wash my own hair because it was too painful and I was unable to walk around too much because my left ankle was so swollen it would crack open if I put too much pressure on it. It was a pretty grim period and to make matters worse, I'd see others who were recovering quicker than I was and from time to time, I'd question if I was doing the right thing - but even in the most desperate of times, the alternative of using topical steroids again was never an option, only ever a daydream when I was really suffering and just wanted a day where I wasn't uncomfortable. I knew topical steroids weren't the answer as they would only mask the real issue. Even though my blog may come across as if I'm anti topical steroids, I'm not - they are a wonder drug - but I truly believe they are never the answer to treat severe eczema and neither do I believe that masking a problem, opposed to treating the root cause, is a good idea. Something must change.

Don't suffer in silence as we are all fighting in one way or another.
Cara xxxx

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