I have waited until now to share that recently I had a little bit of a blip with my skin. Nothing to do with TSW, but through wanting to keep my journey as accurate and honest as possible, I felt it was only right to document my experience anyway, both for myself and in a bid to keep a medical journal of sorts as I still kick myself for not doing it through withdrawal. Back in early August, the UK experienced a heat wave, which decided to outstay its welcome.
I love hot weather, my skin LOVES hot weather ... but not that hot, and after a few days, my skin let me know exactly how much it hated it. Most people associate the UK with umbrellas and mild summers and our heat waves tend to usually last a day or so before going back down to more manageable temperatures - but not this time, and we were treated to over a week of very hot weather that we just weren't used to. Below is a detailed journey of exactly happened - and don't worry, I'm completely fine now.
From left to right: Pic 1 & 2 of the top of my right leg // Pic 3 of my left ankle. All taken on Tuesday 11th August. |
Top pic: right side of torso. Bottom pic: left ankle. Both taken on 13th August. |
By Thursday (13th), when I went out for a long walk late morning time, I had to rush back home so I could get into the shower, feeling that prickly irritation and stinging you get when sweat comes into contact with affected skin.
On Friday (14th), I noticed the top of my left arm become slightly lumpy and irritated, although symptoms were mild. Other areas were still irritated, but less so as the temperature outside finally cooled. It was still very muggy though with thick, hot air.
From left to right: right side of my torso, left arm and left ankle. All taken on 15th August. |
The right side of my torso. Taken on 18th August. |
My skin continued to calm down the following day, but on Monday (17th), even though the weather was cooling down, I felt my skin start to get irritated again and on my walk back from getting food shopping, the skin on my torso especially was prickling and irritated. It calmed down slightly when I had a shower, but over the day, it wasn't pleasant and still uncomfortable. I think as my skin was trying to dry out the rash, it tightened and that made the discomfort greater. On Tuesday (18th), it was a little better and the rashes continued to dry out, although they were still slightly irritated. Over the whole period, it also felt as if there was fluid/water in my body - like it was when I had oedema through TSW, but certainly not as severe (NOTHING comes close to the symptoms you experience through withdrawal).
Both sides of my torso. Taken on 20th August. |
The top of my left arm. Taken on 21st August. |
After that, I completely forgot to document what happened as there was nothing to say or photograph.
I took the odd antihistamine along the way, but to be honest, I didn't find them that effective, so I stopped taking them and let the body do what it needed to do - and I got better regardless.
I believe my body basically had a breakdown, not used to the consistently high temperatures, and I had both water retention and heat rash.
Again, the rash feels as if it never happened and I have smooth, clear skin again with absolutely no irritation.
My left ankle. Taken on 24th August. |
The most positive thing about this heat rash was that my anxiety was completely fine and I really did embrace it without fear. Don't get me wrong, at the time it was very unpleasant, but in an odd way, I felt grateful for it, as I realised how far me and my mind had come. I have definitely healed mentally from TSW. I am now a person with normal skin that had a pretty bad heat rash – that's all. I may have this crazy history, but my skin is no longer my life, like it was for so many years.
I waited until now to tell you about it, when my skin had completely recovered, as I acknowledge my position in this community and how any kind of change to my skin might affect someone in the throes of withdrawal. Anxiety both during and after TSW can be terrible, and I don't want to add to it, but one thing I will NEVER do is lie or filter my journey, because that is not fair to you or me.
I hope my recent experience doesn't upset anyone, but I'd like you to use this post to remember that after TSW, you aren't suddenly made of porcelain, untouched by triggers that would affect a lot of people, regardless of their skin history. I had heat rash because it was very hot and I wasn't used to it. It might have been exacerbated because of what I went through in the past, but who the hell knows - all you need to know now is that I'm fine, my skin is better than ever, and I was only reacting as many people would.
It really does get better, both mentally and physically, but please try to factor in the mental side of this journey, because it is the part which tends to stick around much longer than you expect. Something might looked healed on the outside, but that might just be the beginning. Be kind to yourself, give yourself time to recover from this terrible ordeal you've had to go through and one day it will give you the tools to deal with ANYTHING life throws at you.
What heat rash?
x
Hi Cara,
ReplyDeleteQuestion for you since you seemed to take a long time to heal from TSW as well. I’m nearing 3 years now and my skin just flakes all over the house and I’m constantly sweeping the floors and it’s just so embarrassing. How long until your skin stopped flaking?
Also, my skin is so sensitive right now that even rinsing vegetables in water makes my hands itch. Washing my hands is almost out of the picture! Did they ever happen with you or could it be something else going on?
Thanks!
Hello Justine,
DeleteI'm really sorry you're still suffering :( My withdrawal lasted 26/27 months and the flakes going was a gradual process that got better over my withdrawal period, but was totally fine after. My hands suffered really badly during TSW and for a lot of my experience, my mum had to wash my hair and do basic things for me. Sometimes, she'd even have to wash my hands as they were so cut up. Heartbreaking. I think hands take a long time, simply because we have to use them all the time if that makes sense.
Amazingly though, all the symptoms have gone and I no longer have dry skin or problems with my hands. This heat rash was just heat rash :)
I'm keeping everything crossed that you make a full recovery very soon and I'm sending hugs and healing.
Cara xxxx
Thank you so much for your reply!!!!
ReplyDeleteA pleasure Justine xxxx
DeleteGreat blog Cara. You have given me so much strength throughout TSW. To see you heal, and to read your book, I wouldn't be here without you. I'd still be using steroids. Thank you for all you do for the community.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much Ruth, it truly means a lot <3 xxxx
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